High, Lilly. High, Lilly. How LOW!

I'm a diabetic and I've had a terrible time controlling my blood sugar lately.  In a nutshell, overall my sugar is too high but I also have scary lows.

I don't mean to take this lightly because both highs and lows are serious and one time or another, both have put me in the hospital. However, the low I had last night has to win the Comedy of the Year Award.

First of all, I should explain that when I'm in a sugar low, I become very confused and shaky.  So here's the scene in my bedroom this morning:

• A half gallon of orange juice is on my nightstand.  (And no glass in sight)
• Cookies are scattered all over the floor.  The cookie package is on my nightstand. 
• My glasses are halfway across the room on the floor.
• I'm wearing no pajama bottoms but I find them on the floor covered with orange juice.
• There's a thick towel on the edge of the bed.  When I pick it up, I discover another wet orange juice stain on the sheet.
• I'm not using my CPAP but the mask was hung carefully in the right place and the machine was still running.

I have very hazy memories of' the whole thing, but I think you could safely say that I did not handle this low very well.

Buffalo Bills Fans Show Their Colors

Molly, the little Shih Tzu shown above, is the frequent subject of my cameras.  Molly visits us almost every day and has been known to run away from home to come visit us.  Her mom, Kelly (also shown above) is a dedicated Buffalo Bills fan and she watches most of the football games with my husband.  We decided that Molly needed a little push in the right direction (she's secretly a New England Patriots fan) so we got her the official Bills jersey for Christmas.  Kelly already had her jersey.

Aren't they cute?

Fired Up for My Kindle Fire

I'm waiting ---not patiently---  for my Kindle Fire to be delivered.  My first Kindle has been a constant companion during hospital stays, chemo, and recovery.  It has been elevated to the importance of a life necessity.  I expect the Fire will give even more.

Whining Alert

One of the tough things about cancer is to have a major medical test and then have to wait days or weeks for the results. I wait and whine.

Just Rhetoric

You know how people are always saying things , like "Let us know if you need some help." Last week I decided that I needed help transporting a full sized scooter from inside our house to Leon's room at the nursing home. I thought of a guy I know who has a teenaged son and I thought the two of them could put the scooter on their truck and off-load it at the home.

So I called. No one answered the phone so I left a message. I thought I'd get a reply the next morning. I didn't. Okay, the next morning. I didn't. At that point, I decided they were on vacation. I waited a week. No reply. I waited a second week. No reply. This morning I ran into the spouse of the guy I called. They weren't on vacation.

I solved the transfer of the scooter by calling the local cab company. Two of their vans have ramps. They loaded and unloaded the scooter for me and charged eight bucks. I had planned pay the other guy $25.

I'm back to ignoring offers of help. Most of the time, they're just words.

A Home Visit

Yesterday was a great day. My husband was home for the first time since February 14. Hornell, a very small city, made that possible. The local bus company has some buses equipped with lifts for wheelchair patients. I called the company and arranged rides for him to come home.

We are trying to adjust to our new lives and this is making it much easier. My husband is in a nursing home permanently and I'm living alone for the first time ever. Wait. That's not quite true. I have my two cats.

The Day A Telemarketer Hung Up on Me

Yesterday a telemarketer called. I had a choice of pressing "1' if I wanted my credit card interest rate reduced. Feeling a little grumpy and thoroughly frustrated by the increase in these calls, I decided to press "1". When a real live person came on the line, I asked, "Does anyone there know how to read?" The telemarketer asked me to repeat what I had just said so I asked again if anyone there knew how to read. He cautiously answered yes. I said, "Good. Then read the national Do Not Call list because........" Slam. He hung up on me.

Ah, gee.

Charlie Too

Many, many years ago, my husband and I had a much beloved dog by the name of Charlie Brown. Charlie was a cross between a bassett and beagle. We referred to him as a bassgle. He was a character and after all these years, people still talk about him and of course, he is still very much alive in our hearts. My husband just had a birthday--- which is somewhat of a miracle considering what he went through in a six-week time span, starting on Valentine Day. He had a total hip replacement, two heart attacks, sepsis including a fever of 105 degrees, the C. diff infection, and finally, the implantation of a pacemaker. In that time span, he was in three different hospitals and two nursing homes. His health has improved greatly in the last three weeks and he is now settled in a nursing home for rehab and has set June 15th as his goal to make it home. To make that goal, he has to learn to stand and walk again. My sisters decided he needed a special birthday present so they gave him one of Melissa and Doug's plush animals, pictured above. His gift looks remarkably like our original Charlie Brown so he named his new companion Charlie Too.

Pull For Positive

It has indeed been a rough road so far. In the first month's time, my husband spent time in three hospitals and a rehab facility. Tomorrow he should have a pacemaker implanted and hopefully, that will turn things around.

A major concern is that he has been unable to tolerate physical therapy for the hip because of the heart problems. By the time he can stand physical therapy, will it be too late? At this point, he can't even get out of bed, let alone walk. We have to think positive.

Rough Road Ahead

This has been a rough week. My husband had a full hip replacement on Valentine's Day and a day and a half later had a heart attack. It's been a week of ups and downs, of tests and treatments, of hope and despair, a whole range of emotions. He is still in intensive care and had a good day today.

Ironically, the surgery was postponed two weeks because the cardiologist wouldn't pass him until he had a stress test. And he had to stop for another EKG before he could check in for the surgery. Some things are not predictable despite precautions.

Oops !

It sometimes feels that the older one gets, the more one loses. Things like hearing, eyesight, mobility, etc. The one thing I hope I never lose is my sense of humor.

Consider the following scenario: Very early one morning, the phone wakes me up. I wait for about six rings so my husband can answer it. He never does so I reluctantly pick it up. A voice says, "This is Lifeline. You husband has fallen. Would you unlock the door for the ambulance men?"

I race out of bed, unlock the door, check each room as I fly through, get all the way to the back bedroom without any sign of my husband. Finally, I holler "Where are you?" He replies that he is by the bed. I look down and there he is, on the floor between the bed and a tall chest. Experience has taught me that I can no longer pull him up alone---that's why the ambulance is called. The two firemen and one sheriff's deputy get him off the floor, check for injuries (there were none this time) and leave.

I can finally satisfy my curiosity and ask how he ended up in that spot. It seems that he had been sitting on the edge of the bed and slipped off. I tried not to laugh, knowing that with four very weak limbs, once he started to slide, he was unable to stop himself.

He's having a total hip replacement next Monday. Maybe that will help. In the meantime, my sister suggested that we have seat belts installed on the bed. I found that funny; he didn't.

Yep, thank God for a sense of humor and built-in giggle control.

Garbled Gift List

A friend's sister has two teenaged sons. She told them she wanted a five and a half quart stock pot for Christmas. They gave her two frying pans.

"Targeting" Politicians: Lessons by Sarah Palin

How's this for a great idea? An election is coming up and there are certain individuals you and your kind don't want to see re-elected. You want to communicate that idea to as many others as possible. How will you get their attention? How about setting up a map with the location of each of these undesirables? Maps use symbols to indicate information. What symbol will be most dramatic to target these politicians you want to see defeated? Oh, how about cross hairs? As in gun cross hairs. That should get the idea out.


And while you are targeting some politicians in this way, support your candidate who uses these lines:

Get on Target for Victory in November. Help remove Gabrielle Giffords from office. Shoot a fully automatic M16 with Jessie Kelly.

Does this country need a leader who targets her opponents by using maps with symbols of implied violence? It seems to me that there is enough hate and violence running amok in this country. We don't don't need leaders encouraging more of the same.

I seriously question the judgment of a person involved in the above situations and am appalled that anyone would consider her capable of leading this country.

I am, of course, referring to Sarah Palin.

The Demise of "WHATEVER"

I was just thinkin' that because a headline this morning identified the word "whatever" as the most irritating word in the English language for the second year in a row, that maybe it was time to follow the implied advice of a friend and change the name of my blog. (Thanks, Hank.)

So I have. I'm not sure if 'Just Thinkin' will work out but it's worth a try. Also, Blogger has some new templates so I have changed the look of the blog as well.

Playing CAT and Mouse

As some of you may know, about a year ago, I was diagnosed with stage 3 duodenal cancer. Surgery with that type of cancer is often not an option because of the location near numerous blood vessels. I did have surgery by a gifted surgeon, followed by time to recover from the surgery and then six months of chemotherapy.

Upon the completion of chemo, I had the follow-up tests. The CAT scan showed "spots on my lungs" but all was clear at the site of the original tumor. My oncologist sent me for a PET scan (see image at the right) to find out what the spots were.

I met with him last week. The PET scan revealed one small spot on each lung. However, they were too small to diagnose as benign or malignant. So I'll have another CAT scan in three months to monitor changes in these pesky spots. If it turns out to be more cancer, my feeling is that it's early and treatable.

I can't resist saying that I am now in a CAT and mouse game.

"Merry" Christmas Origin

Each time I'm wished a Merry Christmas, in the back of my mind is the feeling that Merry did not fit with Christmas back in the days when Christmas first became an event. My perception is that the first Christmases were somber events. I finally took the time to check it out.

I was reminded that Christmas was first celebrated in the 4th century AD but the expression "Merry Christmas" was first used in 1699.

Here's the rest of the story:

The term Merry Christmas is not only used by the Christians to greet each other during the festival of Christmas but by all, irrespective of class as well as religion at the time of the Christmas Festival. In the term Merry Christmas, 'Merry' stands for happiness while 'Christmas' meant Christ's Mass in old English.

To learn more, just Google "origin of 'Merry' Christmas" or go here.

Just Call Me Doc

I unwittingly stumbled across an interesting topic today. I had been curious about an acquaintance who had earned his Ph.D from Canterbury University. I was unfamiliar with that school so I googled it.

That's when things got interesting. First of all," Canterbury University" didn't show up but all these vague links appeared. Some of them wanted you to register with personal information. I finally located a "Comments" page where Canterbury was identified as a diploma mill by several people and one even provided the address of its web site. Of course, I've read of diploma mills but knowing someone with one of the degrees is a first..... I think.

Wow. If I want to have a Ph.D, all I have to do is invest $180 and wait a few days for all the documentation to arrive in the mail. You can call me Doc.

Home Sweet Home

I'm home again after spending a few days in the hospital. It feels so good.

Captivating Chemo

Until today, I found that others having chemo at the same time I do did not discuss their cancers during treatment sessions. Today was very different. There were five of us (treatment room holds six) and we were all women. Suddenly, we were all involved in a cancer discussion.

The five of us all had different cancers---lung, liver, pancreatic, breast (spread to lungs) and duodenal. Most of the conversation was about our reactions to chemo. Side effects varied greatly from individual to individual.

We all agreed that we were survivors or we wouldn't have been having the discussion.

Handshake or Fist Bump

I don't deliberately keep a blind over my eyes regarding changes in my world but I must confess that many changes slip by me easily. For example, I have recently become aware of fist bumps as a replacement for handshakes.

I regard this as highly symbolic of the times in which we live. In this age of discord and discontent, a clenched fist encounter replaces the handshake. After all, a handshake pulls you closer to another person, kind of like a mini-hug with the hands. As far as I can tell, today's society regards that at a weakness and the fist bump as a stronger, more aggressive reaction when dealing with another person.

I don't buy it.